Most of us can either look in the mirror or point a finger at someone we call “controlling”. I started examining the icy phrase “control freak” and wondered where the freak part comes in. The more I thought about it, the more I believe it’s a totally overly used and mis-used description.

Here’s why. We humans have ultimate control of only one thing: our experience living this life. We can’t control other people, the weather, the results of events, luck, and on and on. You get my point. We tend to call people who DO try to control things or people outside of themselves “controlling.”

If we totally take responsibility for our own lives, that’s a LOT of consciousness and awareness: and a full time job. Being mindful. Paying attention. If we focus on our own business all the time, we won’t have time or interest in other people’s lives or events. We CAN control out own attitudes and how we respond to every moment in life. It’s the zen or buddha way to live. And that is what the real definition of “control freak” should be. Practicing that is the best way to live. If we all did that, the term would evolve into the highest compliment we could bestow on someone.

 

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